Staying Sane

Q&A Friday Number 2 πŸ˜Ž

MV5BNDg2NjIxMDUyNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMzEzNTE1NTM@._V1_UX182_CR0,0,182,268_AL_
www.imdb.com

Hello dah-lings! I’m quite excited about this week’s question and right off the bat I want to apologize if in asking it I exclude some people …. Some people who haven’t seen or do not like the movie “Bohemian Rhapsody” …. OMG! (I fell off the chair again, picking myself up …) 🀭

I really, really, really love that movie (and you can tell by the number of emojis I use in this post). I haven’t smiled while watching – in deep appreciation and from start to finish – a movie in such a long time. What an experience. Amazing!

Okay so, as I carefully balance my crown (a paper bag with some yarn in it) and flamboyantly flip a corner of my cape (my baby’s bathtowel, because yes, I’m channeling my inner Freddie Mercury πŸ€­πŸ˜„) here’s this week’s question:

What is your one most favorite scene in the movie and why?

My answer is -> that moment when Freddie tells his bandmates that he finally fired his assistant Paul Prenter (Allen Leech) and, when asked on what grounds, simply stated “villainy”.

OMG! 🀩 (There I fall off my chair again πŸ˜„).Β  I laughed so hard at that scene. It was the way he said it, it was so on point – the term, the acting, the succinctness of the response. Ah, just delightful 😘 If Freddie indeed talks that way in real life, and I have no reason to doubt it, I just want to hear him talk 24/7. My mouth would be agape in delight, I think. I think it’s the blend of highbrow words, the accent and the flamboyancy.

In any case, my neck is starting to get painful from this “crown” πŸ˜„ so now on to you – tell me in the πŸ‘‡comments sectionπŸ‘‡what your one most favorite scene in the movie was and why.

And, have you downloaded the songs yet? I mean, come on!Β  ❀️ 🀩 What’s on loop in your player? (Ha! That’s question #2 for today and you can answer this too if you like ❀️).

Advertisements
The Introvert Expat SAHM Diaries

Another Reason I Feel Ambivalent About Social Media

So now that my friends are following me on my IG, I am reminded of one of the major reasons I quit Facebook many years ago – the feeling that I have to respond (at the very least “like”) their posts. (Which can be a total time-suck by the way, well, you know how it is).

Now I am in no way saying that my friends are requiring this of me, or at the very least, expecting this of me. The feeling of obligation is entirely mine. And I am quite good at dismissing it, actually.Β  But then another niggling thought surfaces: will my silence cost me likes and comments as well?

Aye, there’s the rub!

Because who among us doesn’t want that kind of support, encouragement and show of interest that comes from their likes & comments? It’s a wonderful feeling. Why deny yourself of that?

But the thing is, some of my friends like to stalk themselves (i.e. make a running commentary of their daily lives). There is nothing wrong with this, they are having fun and are not hurting anyone. But now, instead of seeing and being inspired by beautiful crochet masterpieces from the lovely creative people that I follow, I now see trivial, mundane photos of ordinary daily life. (Which, after a series of similar posts, ceases to be interesting to me, if I am to be completely honest).

To me this is a double-edged sword. On the one hand it feels wonderful to be among friends, on the other, it is a distraction. I find myself at times wanting to unfollow and feeling guilty (a bad friend) for having that thought. I yearn for the blissful peace that I once experienced when I was just putting myself out there to strangers – no expectations, no obligations. (I also kept myself distanced from the occasional skirmish that seems to be normal among housewives/girlfriends. They’re thankfully temporary, we get back to wearing identical tops soon enough 🀭)

I guess I am just weird / naive / stuck-up / stick-up-her-arse / being a snob like that πŸ€­πŸ˜„

What are your thoughts about this kind of dilemma? Any tips for me?

 

Staying Sane

Q&A Friday πŸ˜€

 

It’s been a while since I’ve had some sort of Q&A fun on this blog and I miss it. I always have fun answering those simple, get-to-know-yourself questions or self-reflection prompts and I bet many of you do too.

Hmmm, might even make it a regular Friday feature. (Or every other Friday? πŸ€”) Well at the very least this I know for sure, there are 8 Fridays remaining of 2018 (including today) and we can do 8 questions, right? Let’s do that!

So lemme start with this week’s prompt — join me in the comments section, ok? πŸ˜€

Have you done anything [a bit] out of character lately? What was it and why.

My answer to this is a “yes”. And it was sharing my goals for next year with my friends. Why? Because I realized I needed “cheerleaders”.

~ oOo ~

I recently opened an Instagram account because I’m intending to sell my crochet/knitting next year. There are already a few posts of my creations on there and, of course, none of me [because it’s pure business]. I wasn’t planning on telling my friends about it because I’m afraid of what they might think (silly, right? 🀭). But when we had a group chat earlier this week I went ahead and announced it, even asked them to like every post and follow me 😁

Originally I thought I could just tell casual acquaintances about my IG and let it grow organically, and then (maybe) tell my friends about it much later. I’ve always been like this. I don’t mean to be secretive, just that I don’t want attention at the start of something, when everything is “iffy”.

But lately I had a thought where I realized perhaps thinking this way is unfair. Perhaps in doing so I was instead cheating myself out of “cheerleaders”. And perhaps what I needed to think was that if any of them should think negatively, for me to not let it deter me.

I then thought back to times in my life when I had done something without talking to friends about it, and I realized a few wrong moves could have been avoided had I just done so.

To be totally honest with you, there was a full minute-and-a-half of internal struggle going on in my head before I finally told my friends about my IG. And right after that I went “whatdidIdowhatdidIdowhatdidIdooooo???“.Β  But now, I’m relaxed and feeling emboldened. Like, okay, now to give them a grrrrreat show! 😎

~ oOo ~

And that’s me. How about you? Fire up my comments section right away! πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡ I’ll be waiting πŸ™‚

handmade business, The Introvert Expat SAHM Diaries

My Brain’s Abuzz With 2019

Blame it on the ambivalent & un-inspiring goals I set for myself in 2018 (though I can’t be too hard on myself, I had recently given birth you know 😊), but my brain’s been abuzz with goals for 2019.

My episode of painful gastritis really did help me clarify things, one of them was realizing that I can’t really do “loose weight” as a goal again. I mean, yes, I could do with some weight loss, but I want this to be a side-effect of something bigger (and healthier!). Like fasting, because weight-loss is just one of the many effects of it and it isn’t even the best or most noteworthy.

Anyhow, I realized that I am galvanized into action by level-up goals that are fun and exciting but are also a bit scary and outside my comfort zone. I mean, I guess all of us are like this, no? In my case the more thought I gave to it the more it started to look like this:

goal: make life in Batam fun & engaging <- learn Indonesian <- make local friends (I only have fellow expat wives as friends so far) <- use my craft as a springboard <- sell my creations for fun <- learn all about social & online selling

Now this is really starting to look like a decent party 🀩

Already, because these goals are that exciting to me, I’ve taken some relevant action. I got friendly with my next-door neighbor. Now at least I’m friendly with someone local and hopefully she knows of a church that has English service (next action item).

I also made good on something I’ve wanted for some time, a dedicated craft site (fifiandriri.com). I also opened an IG account to serve as a portfolio of my creations. I’m finishing up all my crochet/knitting WIP’s at the moment so that I can start clean asap, with an eye on social selling this time.

I’m reading up about the handmade business, and my brain is lit with ideas and more to-do’s like learning product photography and opening up an FB for biz account.

So exciting! πŸ€ͺ

bulletin-board

How is all this going to help me with learning Indonesian? Simple, language is best learned though interaction & immersion. I’ve tried cooping myself up indoors facing my computer, the results are minimal and I’m not having any fun at all while at it. So I need to be out there and talk!

And how is this gonna force me into loosing weight? Well, lemme tell ya: I love to crochet lacy pieces of clothing. Clothing need to be modeled by a real person. You do the rest of the math 😁 😁

The Introvert Expat SAHM Diaries

Goals, Gastritis & That Blog I Was Telling You About

mark-adriane-259950-unsplash
source

Hello my beautiful, awesome friends! It’s been a while. How ya’ll doin’? πŸ˜€

I’m here to share with you that I’ve done and am doing something I find truly exciting.

But before that, a backstory in the briefest way I can do it:

The last time we “talked” I was going on about these goals I had, right? And that I was working on them, but it was all feeling like an uphill climb. I knew something was amiss since I was really struggling with them.

So I had to stop and take stock. I dove into motivational material, listened to Jim Rohn, Jack Canfield, Lisa Nichols and a bunch of life coaches on Podcasts and I realized the problem was that my goals just weren’t exciting.Β  There was no thunder and lightning at all. And they didn’t pull me out of my comfort zone in ways that energized me.

At about the same time I realized this I experienced gastritis along with the worst period pains E-VERR. It was absolute torture! But all the doctor said was …and you’re not gonna believe this, he said “just be happy”. Literally. I’m serious.

Now I totally believe in the mind-body connection, so I didn’t need to be told twice. I immediately improved the quality of the food I was eating, shifted to the kind of exercise my body truly enjoyed, tackled a couple of small but annoying things in my life, continued to feed my brain with motivational material, and allowed myself to just forget “those effing goals” for a while.

Just a few days into this routine I noticed that I could see better.Β  I’m like “why is the TV so much clearer all of a sudden?!”.Β  I also felt physically lighter. I can’t quite explain it but I was moving with more ease and fluidity and as though I had lost a ton of weight.Β  I was also in a more positive mindset.Β  My brain chatter was just … better…?Β  It’s like I gained some maturity, resilience, confidence & purposefulness all in one. So yes, improving your diet, exercising better and filling your brain with positive stuff makes all the difference in the world.

But the biggest take-away for me is really this: I created new goals and I made them genuinely relevant and scary-exciting.Β  I will be sharing more about them with you in upcoming posts but for now I would L❀️VE for you to head on over to fifiandriri.com and tell me what you think πŸ™‚

Thanks and, I’ll talk to you soon πŸ’‹

Knitting

Knit Racerback Tee

IMG_5957

Look at this pretty thing that I finished this month! She is gor-geous!  🀩

IMG_5962

As a neophyte knitter, I really, really love it whenever I make something that I can wear. It’s just so amazing, I’m still not used to it (and I hope I never get used to it).

IMG_5961

Just look at how she transforms when I add a necklace. She’s so versatile 😘 I could knit this in more colors, so easy!

Here‘s the free pattern if you’re interested.

Sane At Home Mom

Hunkering Down: Learning the Indonesian Language Week 2

bali-237205_960_720

Let’s Start With A True Story

This week’s work commenced last Saturday when, while visiting a nearby mall, I told my husband “jangan bantu saya, mau berlatih bahasa indonesia saya” (do not help me, I want to practice my Indonesian).

I went in to a store selling women’s accessories and, as expected, was approached by the attendant. She was explaining something about an ongoing promotion, which I understood by just focusing on key words (and the promotional signs). I asked something in my broken Indonesian, she realized I didn’t speak the language and, as I have observed many times in the past, answered by speaking so very fast that all I understood was the language’s signature rolling “R” 😳

Good Lord, help me. Whenever this happens, I want to revert to English so that it’s them having the headache, not me! (That’s my frustrated reaction).

But I soldiered on.

I asked her to please speak slowly, that I was still learning the language – all this in perfect Indonesian because by now this phrase is burned into my brain. Her reaction was one I interpreted to be akin to mockery, complete with that side-smile and downcast eyes. She then removed herself from the scene/situation ☹️

Now, I am not saying they all react discouragingly like this (although I do remember another store attendant who also attended to me with an air of annoyance). I don’t know what that lady’s problem was or what she was thinking at the time. Although I managed to walk out that store with 2 sets of lovely earrings (and 2 bracelets for my eldest), I spent a good part of the weekend feeling disheartened.

Jeez, it sure feels like “arse” to feel incompetent like that.

πŸ˜’πŸ˜’πŸ˜’

Here’s how the rest of week 2 went:

Monday

Lesson 49. Done!

Tuesday

Lesson 50 & 51. Done!

The cleaning lady praises my efforts for learning the language. She calls me “pandai” (smart/clever). She goes as far as to compare me with other expat wives who go back to their home countries with nada an Indonesian word under their belts.

Finally some encouragement!

I feel like I’m Wonder Woman πŸ˜€

Image result for wonder woman she can do it

Wednesday

Lesson 52 & 53. Done!

Thursday

Something unpleasant happened the evening before. So today I just want to soak my brain in positivity and possibility.

And knit.

Friday

It took me all the king’s horses and all the king’s men to go back and tackle lesson 54 again.

Image result for minion tired

Week 2 Conclusion:

On speaking with the locals ~ Most of the time, my frustration is that they don’t speak slowly when they reply. They only try to choose other words to explain the same thing but this just confuses me even more. They appreciate the effort I make, but it’s as though they get self-conscious when they respond that they just want to get it over with by speaking very fast and leaving it at that. And if the person being spoken to happens to know a bit of English, he will respond in English so that I am no better off than when I started.

But, I am fortunate to have a cleaning lady who knows enough English for us to be able to communicate. She’ll be taking on a more active role in this process moving forward 😁

On studying:

It still feels like punishment.

 

… to week 3, and beyond!