The Introvert Expat SAHM Diaries

Not This Year

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When I was still climbing the career ladder I was a very goal oriented employee. I would reverse engineer the annual performance review by picking out in advance the areas I wanted to stand out in, and proceeded to take on the shiniest projects that would showcase my excellence in those areas.

I had this system so well down pat that when I became a housewife I experienced some sort of crisis. It felt like I was let loose all of a sudden and all that freedom was just confusing, I didn’t know what to do with it.

For maybe a year or two I had a notebook and pen and wrote down monthly goals such as “learn to cook 2 new recipes”, or “learn to knit beginner’s level”, or “lose X number of lbs”.

But there was no annual review to prepare for, no boss to wow, no gold stars to earn & show-off on my imaginary wall of fame that I slipped into nonchalance. I set vague goals that I forgot the following week. Or, I didn’t follow through, or I list so many that I overwhelm myself into catatonia all the while thinking that I have all the time in world to do them anyway.

Lately though I have become conscious of it and I do not like it. The more I think about it, the more it seems to me that I’m not even showing up for myself. I say I will do something but I don’t even honor my word.

So I went back to my notebook, looked at the goals I set for this year and decided to re-commit. It’s not yet too late, I can still hunker down and make a dash for the finish line.

My goals for this year were/are:

  1.  lose post-pregnancy weight – but I didn’t specify how much and how to do it (because, who cares except me, right?)
  2.  learn Indonesian – I bought an online course & some books that are now just gathering dust in some nondescript drawer
  3. start a separate blog dedicated to crafting – I did partially discuss this here, but I failed to clarify that I wanted a separate, topic specific blog because I want to do something with it later

I still wrote down a couple or 3 more but that’s just my sneaky brain trying to overwhelm me again and disperse my focus.

I am deciding to take deliberate action on these goals for the remaining 6 months so that at the end of 2018 I will have finished the things I set out to do. This matters because I don’t want to have to do them again next year, I want to create space for new goals in 2019.

And perhaps, even more importantly, I don’t want to excel at quitting, I want to excel at staying committed.

 

Photo by han song on Unsplash
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Potpourri

For the Love of Lists – #1 – Lists

I just had to re-blog this. I’m an enthusiastic list-person too! How about you? 🙂

Please view and comment on the original here.

teaandhotsauce

I have a huge thing for lists. Give me some paper and a pen and I will be entertained; lists of stuff to do, stuff to buy, stuff to try, stuff I’ve done, you name it.

In honor of lists and in honor of what will likely be one of many posts involving lists, here is a list of my Top 5 reasons for loving lists.
  1. Lists Can Be CatharticWhen I am feeling stressed, anxious, depressed or simply introspective, lists area way of taking a tornado of busy thoughts and funneling them (mind the pun) out of my head and onto paper. Seeing your crazy in bullet form helps take the crazy away.
  2. Lists = StationaryI find lists vastly improved with a favorite pen and nice stationary. Lists, I have determined, are a good excuse to regularly purchase fresh stationary. This is demonstrated by the diverse…

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